The Tunnel Of Love

In the adventure of mothering it’s often hard to find the time (or energy) to make our way to the “Tunnel of Love”. Our focus is (often all consumingly so) on the needs and desires of our children, and those needs and desires can take us on any number of “rides” each day. It is easy to neglect our own needs, including our need for love, and for a romantic relationship with our spouse. It’s easy to fall into routine and let our day to day dealings with one another define our marriage. Taking the time to be together; to truly enjoy one another, can seem a daunting task – something that is somehow less important than “the rest” of our responsibilities. But think of this verse from Mark:

Mark 10:9 “Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate” (NIV)

Many marriage ceremonies include this verse and hearing it brings happy thoughts of joy, love and pride to my heart. I am honestly blessed with a wonderful husband and we both are dedicated to our marriage, but we’ve learned over the last ten years that being married isn’t easy, and being married with kids… well, that’s even harder! During our wedding ceremony I heard that verse and in my mind thought of the “man” simply as some other person trying to come between us, but now, I see how easy it can be to let our own neglect be that “man” trying to separate us. The only way I know to prevent that separation is to make sure that we make time for each other on a regular basis. Time that is just ours – no kids, no friends… just US! We can’t always “get away”, either time or money (and some times both) can be in short supply, and when both happen to be available at the same time the energy is often lacking. We don’t have a date night every week (but I admire those who do!) and often “our time” is that precious quiet after the boys are in bed. A couple of hours spent together discussing the day’s events or watching a movie (or television show) together. However, with Valentine’s Day approaching I’ve been looking for fun (easy, and cheap) romantic ideas to help show my love. There are many ideas out there, but here are a few that I wanted to share:

Valentines Memories – buy a box of valentines cards (the kind school kids pass out to their class), on each envelope write “Remember when…” and then on the back of each card finish the sentence with a fun memory that the two of you share.

SHMILY – leave a little note “See How Much I Love You” for your husband to find, make a game of it, take turns hiding the note where you know the other will come across it, each time it’s found it will serve as a reminder of the love you share for one another.

Learn Something New – take a class together (Ralph’s in Tiffin and Fremont offer one day/night cooking classes), rent (or borrow from the library) a biography or documentary and watch it together, read to one another, attend a Bible study or retreat together.

Have FUN! – play a game together, challenge one another to board games, card games, even a quick game of tic-tac-toe! Watch a funny movie or go to a comedy performance together, and enjoy each other’s laughter.

No matter how you choose to spend time together, the most important thing is that you DO find the time for each other. So go ahead, get in line… the Tunnel of Love is a GREAT ride!! Not only are we strengthing our relationship with our spouse, our children benefit from seeing the love that we share with our spouse so, by putting yourself first once in a while, we are teaching them to do the same when they too become parents one day.